Saturday, April 4, 2009

Happy Birthday Mama!!





















Today, 49 years ago, my mother Deborah Anne was born. Unfortunately, she is unable to celebrate her birthday this year. On July 23, 2008 she lost her courageous battle with cancer. Today is one of my tough "grieving days". Even though I am with a heavy heart today, my mother would want me to celebrate. When I think of her, the first thing I see is that huge smile she had. It is still hard to remember what she looked like before the cancer took a hold of her body, but even when it did, it never took her smile or her spirit. My mother was one tough cookie, showing strength that I was not even aware that she had. I want to reflect on the kind of mother she was for the 26 years I had with her. She was loving, kind, never missed an event for her children. She would go without the clothes on the back for the six of us. I was so fortunate for the mother I had, and for the values and morals she instilled within me. So even though the road will be long without her, and some days I feel that I can't go on without her, I know one thing for sure; she is in my heart. I would give ANYTHING in the world to have her here again, but unfortunately God doesn't work that way. I am lucky to be a spitting image of her, I thank God for that. So today mama, I may be sad I don't have you here, I know that you are having the most wonderful birthday up in heaven with your daughter, and my sister Angeila. I know that makes you smile to be with her again. Don't worry, I have not broken my promise, I am taking care of Dad and everyone else the best I can.
I would like to leave you with some pictures of my mom. (Which are above) Fortunately before she passed we had a wedding session together knowing she would not make it to my special day. She was beautiful no matter what, and I will always love her for that.

10 comments:

d.a.r. said...

I'm so very sorry that you lost your mom. That has to be unexplainably difficult. What wonderful memories you guys had time to make though....cherish those! I'm certain that she does :)

Krystyna Lizabeth. said...

I miss mom too.
and I can't wait for your monday memories of her.
check out my post about her today :)
it really helped me handle the day without breaking down and crying.

KRISTEN'S PALACE said...

wow. my words cant express my pain for you. i watched my ninny pat go through that, and my dad. I'm so sorry. but you are so strong for posting this. i'm praying for you! :) just know that.

Moving said...

I am so so so sorry!!!! My mom passed away 15 years ago, So i kow how hard it is not to have a mom!!!

mary evelyn said...

aww, your mom is beautiful. i'm so sorry about your loss. i count my blessings everyday that my mom survived her cancer, and is now a seven year breast cancer survivor. i can't imagine having to go through the loss that you suffered.

Danielle said...

I'm so sorry--she looked like such a wonderful woman! Glad you found a way to reflect on the happiness and good times :)

Taryn said...

Thank you for sharing this. I am so sorry for your loss.

Finding Liz said...

I am so sorry for your loss...I read your sisters blog and now was starting to read yours....but I can't read anymore. I am dying to cry.

I know exactly how you feel and the loss of my is a huge weight on me. JUst looking at pics of you and your mom reminds me so much of my dad. I lost him three weeks ago and miss him so so so much. God bless.

Lucy Marie said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. Those pictures are beautiful and I'm sure you will cherish them forever. I can't imagine the pain that you feel - my mother battled cancer five years ago and I am fortunate to still have her by my side to this day. Thank you for reminding me how appreciative I need to be. Praying for you and your family.

The Mrs. said...

What a great post about your mom. I cant imagine the loss and the hurt in your heart. Hold your memories close and continue to make her proud!